Are You Ready for Some Football...and Grief?

Are you ready for some football? Because I AM! It’s late August and I am bookmarking the crockpot meals I am promising to make every Sunday until February, picking out my new Colts merch and deciding who will get a coveted spot on my Fantasy Football team. Name TBD!

I get some level of football fever this time every single year. This year might be slightly increased because I am doing Sports Bitches (like, subscribe, rate and review) with my two fave gals Sarah Tiana and Rachel Bonnetta!

Football season also marks the beginning of Fall. And I’m sorry but Fall is the best season. It’s beautiful, it’s not too hot, not too cold, there’s a crisp smell in the air and you get to eat a hearty meal out of necessity! Your body needs chili!

(LA’s “Fall” is usually still in the 90s but I am going to Indy for 2 whole weeks!)

The heightened football excitement might also be because I really like this Colts team. And when you have to spend 3 consecutive seasons cheering for Philip Rivers, Carson Wentz and Matt Ryan cosplaying as Joe Biden, you deserve a little optimism. Now we have a healthy (and hopefully staying that way) Anthony Richardson and a crop of young talent that I am not mad at yet.

But the NFL season hasn’t actually started yet and I am not depressed enough to watch a full pre-season game and pretend it matters. But what has started and kicked off my football fever: Hard Knocks!

I love Hard Knocks. I love Hard Knocks so much I once paid money to do a Hard Knocks podcast about the Colts in-season year that I am almost certain no one listened to.

For those of you that don’t know, Hard Knocks is one of the OG sports docu-series that we can credit with the incredible (and overwhelming) amount of sports docu-series we see when we turn on any streamer. It’s an HBO show that goes inside one NFL team’s training camp. It has evolved over the years and absolutely been diluted by the fact that most NFL teams don’t really want to be featured on the show.

(DO NOT WATCH LAST YEAR’S JETS SEASON IT IS TERRIBLE)

It usually follows a team that did no make playoffs the previous season and a team that has a MASSIVE storyline going into the upcoming season. This year, it’s the Chicago Bears. The Bears had a lot of drama surrounding there perennial underperformance at QB by Justin Fields who was shipped off to the Steelers (yuck) so the Bears could keep their number 1 pick and use it on USC star, Caleb Williams.

The Bears are an original 6 NFL team. They have been a franchise since 1920 and have a storied past of amazing defenses (and bad QBs). And their fanbase is ravenous. Or as the youth would say “delulu.” There is an entire SNL sketch based on the absurdity and passion of Chicago Bears fans. People care! And I am sure you know all of this because you’ve probably met a person from Chicago for more than 4 minutes and heard them say “1985” over and over again until they fell asleep on an Italian beef as a pillow.

Enter 2024. The Bears have the number one overall pick and use it on their guy (they hope and pray), Caleb Williams. And Hard Knocks is covering all of this! Williams, as the number one pick, has been heavily scrutinized and picked apart. There were dozens of headlines and think pieces about him…crying with his mom after a loss (can you imagine!?) and…painting his nails!!! How could he!?

Please keep in mind there have been QBs taken at number one who have credible sexual assault allegations in their past. But Caleb cried and painted his nails so people don’t know if he can be trusted!

Yes, this type of insanity dampens my football fever but I get to pick if I like Caleb Williams or not. And I do!

I usually do not root for the Bears because the Colts beat them in the 2006 Super Bowl and I find their fans to be (mostly) insufferable idiots. Minus all of my Bears fans friends who I love deeply and privately text support to.

Watching Hard Knocks and seeing this Caleb Williams storyline play out has been interesting. And because I lived in Chicago and LOVE the city, it’s just exciting to see where they film and to hear Liev Schreiber, the voice of Hard Knocks, say words like “Improv” or “Second City”. I go nuts for this shit!

I have tons of friends and family who are diehard Bears fans. And I want them to be happy (just not at the expense of the Colts).

One of my favorite people to talk about the Bears with was my friend Kenny.

Kenny passed away in December of 2023. He didn’t see the Bears draft Caleb Williams. He’s not watching this season of Hard Knocks. But I have this feeling that he knows and is seeing all of this.

I cannot watch the show and not think about my friend I miss. So while I was watching last week’s episode I decided to text him. Because that’s what I would have done if he was still here with us. And when Caleb Williams has a great play, I am going to text him again. And if Anthony Richardson throws for 5 TDs in a game, I am going to know Kenny saw it and would be texting me if he could.

And I know this started as a rallying cry for why I am so excited about the upcoming NFL season and has evolved into me sorting through my own grief but that’s what sports fandom is. Yes, it is the wins and losses and rivalries but for me it is also the community.

I am excited to get to talk to my friends about football because I am excited to get to talk to my friends! My Fantasy Football league is all women I went to college with (shoutout Sacks in the City) and I love when the group chat gets booted back up again.

I end up talking to my family more during football season. Sometimes it’s my dad texting “what’s the score” because he’s 69 and doesn’t understand how to find the games on streaming but it is talking to him.

I cannot believe I am watching the Bears on Hard Knocks and I don’t get to talk to Kenny about Matt Eberflus’ daughters. We could have talked about Grace and Giada for hours! But I feel the most connected to Kenny, since his passing, when I am watching Hard Knocks.

Sports fandom is about connection and community. Yes, there is the bad stuff in sports. The bad guys, the toxic fans, the injuries, the corruption. Listen, we are well aware!!! But I also see these Swifties coming into NFL fandom for the first time and looking at each other going “is this awesome?” and yes it IS awesome!

For all of the bad parts of sports there are just as many, if not more, wonderful parts. This weeks, Hard Knocks featured an insane story about a guy buying a ferret of Craiglist and a white boy so white he has blonde eyelashes sang Keyshia Cole’s Love in front of all of his teammates and killed it!

So yes, maybe I am going to root for Caleb Williams this year because Kenny isn’t here to do that. But just maybe Kenny is pulling some strings somewhere and Caleb Williams is going to get the Angels in the Outfield treatment. If he makes an insane throw, I’m giving Kenny the credit.